Heart Won't Lie
by amazing07
Summary: Ryan and Kendall try to reconnect on Fusion's rooftop during a party. Circa early 2008. Rendall.


**Heart Won't Lie**

**Ryan and Kendall**

**Set circa early 2008  
**

Ocean blue eyes latched onto sparkling emerald ones, holding on for dear life. She cherished the feel of his rough hand on her arm, gently touching her for the first time in a long time. They took each other in, relishing in a tiny moment that was theirs and theirs alone.

It was one of those rare, craved instants between them that had nothing to do with their son, their spouses, or their other children. It was in these tiny moments that Ryan and Kendall had to live the lifetime together that they couldn't do everyday.

They both knew the score. They just realized what they were to each other too late in the game.

Soulmates. Destined. Meant to be.

Or any of the other clichés Kendall made fun of, and a part of her hated him for it.

_(Looking back over the years_

_Of all the things I've always meant to say_

_But words didn't come easily_

_So many times through empty fears_

_Of all the nights I tried to pick up the phone_

_So scared of who might be answering…)_

His free hand slowly ascended her lithe body, sinking into her wild curls, swiping his thumb over her defined cheek bone. Kendall shuddered against his gentle, seductive touch, eyes still on his.

Feeling chills swarm her unusually hot body, Kendall denied it. It was this place. Not Ryan. It was the memories. Nostalgia.

The Fusion rooftop held a lot of memories for her. And him. But he knew it was more than nostalgia and deep down so did she.

How had he ever walked away from her?

How had she let him get away with it?

_(You try to live your life from day to day_

_But seeing you across the room tonight_

_Just gives me away…)_

Kendall did life-altering on a daily basis, but the most profound by far was the day she stopped fighting for this man's love. She fought so hard for so long, and there came a time to cut your losses.

She married Zach, made Ryan's wives her best friends, and created two little boys. One belonging to her husband and the other belonging to the love of her life. Kendall may have stopped fighting for Ryan, but she infiltrated his world so deeply that it was impossible for him to live without her.

Jerking her closer to him, her lips a heartbeat away, her dress pressed against his suit, Ryan wanted her. He wanted the life with her that he was supposed to have. He wanted the life he had thrown away so badly that it crippled him.

_('Cause the heart won't lie_

_Sometimes life gets in the way_

_But there's one thing that won't change_

_I know I've tried_

_The heart won't lie_

_You can live your alibi_

_Who can see you're lost inside a foolish disguise_

_The heart won't lie…)_

"Ryan-Ryan, I - I can't." Tears poured down her face, as both his hands came up to hold her cheeks, her hands on his wrists, his lips still a breath away.

"You can! You can, Kendall! I -" He trailed off as she violently shook her head.

"Don't say it. Don't you dare say it! If you do, I won't be able to leave. I need to leave." Kendall sighed, ragged and full of raw emotion. His bright ocean blue eyes were so determined, so fierce, on her own. She wanted to give in and make love to him here on the roof like they had so many years ago, but she couldn't. She had ruined enough lives during her reign on this earth without adding Zach and Annie's names to the list.

"Who says you should?" Ryan asked her, desperate. She tried to move away, but he held her there, staring into those lethal emerald eyes, knowing that she had to power to destroy this last chance of happiness he had tried to grab.

"I say I should! Ryan, I'm married! You're married! We have children! This isn't just our lives anymore!" Kendall shouted at him, finally jerking away, turning her back to him. Shoulders tense, she crossed her arms across her chest, trying to be angry, trying to get him to back down. She didn't know how much longer she'd last before she gave in to the love she'd always felt for this man.

_(Long after tonight_

_Will you still hear my voice through the radio_

_Old desires make us act carelessly_

_Long after tonight, after the fire_

_After the scattered ashes fly_

_Through the four winds blown and gone_

_Will you come back to me?)_

"If you'd just listen…" Ryan started, but she spun around, emerald fire in her eyes.

"I've ruined enough lives! I've done my share of the damage! I have my boys now, Ryan. Ruining lives is behind me. Even if…this is forever over between us." She said, calming, resigned to spending her life without him. She had settled herself with pesky ex-fiancée who was his best friend and confidante long ago. She'd made it through watching him marry another woman. Twice.

If she could do that, she could do anything.

She could make it through losing a chance with him again. It might kill her, but she was a Kane. She could do it.

_(You try to live your life from day to day_

_But seeing you across the room tonight_

_Just gives me away_

_'Cause the heart won't lie_

_Sometimes life gets in the way_

_But there's one thing that won't change_

_I know I've tried_

_The heart won't lie_

_You can live your alibi_

_Who can see you're lost inside a foolish disguise_

_The heart won't lie…)_

**********************************************************************

Of course, Kendall knew that years from now after her beautiful boys had collapsed in their beds, exhausted, after a long day playing soccer and her husband had excused himself as well, she'd sit up. She'd sit up and think back to this moment with snifter of brandy in her hand, staring out into space, and she'd tremble with the 'what ifs'.

Her husband that slept so soundly upstairs, secure in his wife and his family -- she'd curse his name, his hands that had caressed her, his lips that kissed her. She would resent him and herself and, in moments of weakness, even her sons. She'd grow older, drunker by the year. So bitter that misery seeped from her pores.

And standing there now, she still couldn't take what Ryan was offering. If she did and he gave up on her again, she didn't think she would make it past that. Her steel core would crumble into ashes and she would become a pale replica of who she was.

_(The first time I laid my eyes on you I knew. _

_We'd spend this life side by side. _

_I still feel the same though you're so far away. _

_I swear that you'll always be my…)_

Her emerald eyes sparkled with an ocean of unshed tears, daring to look at him again, feeling the necessary anger die on her tongue. With him looking at her like that, Kendall felt like she could do anything. Anything but this.

"Kendall, don't you realize," Ryan said, coming up, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, smiling slightly. "…that this will never be over between us. How can it be when I crave you with every breath I take?"

Her heartbeat fluttered as his eyes danced and those words took hold of her. He didn't care about Annie or Zach or Greenlee. He cared about Kendall, their children, and the life they could have together. If she'd just let them. He was ready now - finally - to take hold of the miracle he'd been given when Kendall walked into his life so many years ago.

"Ryan -"

"I'm not done. All that talk about ruining lives…Kendall, you are my life. Everything I do is for you and the kids. Annie and Zach…they're suffering, too. They deserve to be with people who love them. Deny it all you want, but I know you love me still. Just as much as I still love you."

_(Forever love. _

_I promise you. _

_Someday we'll be together._

_ Forever love. _

_I won't give up._

_ No matter what. _

_I'll be waiting for you. _

_Forever love…)_

She wanted to give in, crush his mouth to her own, feel him beneath her fingertips. She wanted it so bad she could almost taste him despite that it had been years since the last time her lips had touched his. Kendall ached to touch him. She clenched her hands into fists, resisting, fighting her love for him.

"You don't want me, Ryan. You want the idea of me. We've been through this twice before, and both times… you walked away. As much as you love me on paper, the real thing just didn't cut it." Her voice began to crack, tears glimmering in her emerald eyes, cheeks rosy from anger, fists clenched in longing.

Ryan's face filled with pain. "Kendall, you don't mean that."

"The hell I don't! Ryan, I'm not going to do this with you. I - I can't. It hurts too much."

_(Minutes and hours and years may go by. _

_But my heart knows nothing of time. _

_So don't cry, just keep me right there. _

_In your dreams. _

_And hold on to these words of mine…)_

"Okay. Okay." Ryan replied, coming closer to her still, hands on her arms, jerking her back to him, holding her there as she struggled against his touch. "I love you. Not just on paper. All you, all the time. Even when you're being a spoiled brat like right now."

Her eyes flickered shut, body stiffening, her heart leaping in her chest as her stomach sank to her knees, "Ryan."

It was the only word she recognized. Everything else seemed so far away but his arms around her and his name on her lips.

"I'll go back inside and smile at your husband, kiss my wife. Forget this ever happened. But you have to do one thing for me first."

_(Forever love. _

_I promise you. _

_Someday we'll be together. _

_Forever love. _

_I won't give up. _

_No matter what. _

_I'll be waiting for you. _

_Forever love…)_

"What?"

"Tell me you don't love me. Tell me Zach makes you happier than I ever could. Tell me you love him."

"Do you want me to lie to you, Six Pack?" She snapped, eyebrows knitted together, looking up into his eyes, desperately trying to summon all of the anger she'd had seconds ago.

"Speak from your heart, Kendall." He placed a hand over her chest, feeling it beat beneath his palm. "The heart won't lie."

"I love Zach. He's makes me happy. I don't - I don't love you." She swallowed, emotionless as she said it, not daring to look away from his ocean blue eyes as she did it, feeling as if she were betraying Ryan instead of her husband.

_( Love is the road to our destiny. _

_Nothing can change what is meant to be…)_

"You always were a damn liar." Ryan laughed, grinning, sweeping her up in his arms again, lips descending upon hers. The first taste took him back to the Pine Cone many years ago, her underneath him, a whole life ahead of them.

"I can't. We can't." She tore her lips away, reeling from the loss of him, looking up into his aroused, ocean blue eyes.

"Do you still love me, Kendall?" Ryan asked her. "Like you used to?"

"You know I do, Six Pack. Everything else was a lie." She swore, unable to fight him any longer. His lips found hers again in a grateful sigh, feeling for the first time in forever that he had a future. His future was in his arms, kissing his lips, preying on him with her touch.

"Good. As long as I have you, I can do anything."

_(Forever love. _

_I promise you. _

_Someday we'll be together. _

_Forever love. _

_I won't give up. _

_No matter what. _

_I'll be waiting for you._

_ Forever love…)_


End file.
